No Sex and the City

I went to NYC this weekend to visit my very good friend, Pat. He kept trying to convince me to move there by tempting me with music venues and delicious food. For example, this Peanut Butter Cheesecake:

Fuck.

Finally, he brought out the big guns when he fed me this line: "I really don't think you'd be single here." Now, this would have been more convincing if it didn't come after the following events:


1) Very old man comes up to me at the bar, rubs my arms, and whispers in my ear, "I just really needed to touch you." -- Um, haven't we learned anything from Penn State? Just because you want to touch someone (much much younger than you) doesn't mean you're allowed to, sir.


2) Homeless man yells at Pat, "What the hell are you doing with my wife?!" -- This was simply terrifying. Since Pat and I are not married, we were initially utterly confused as to why this man was yelling at us. We actually thought he was yelling at the woman with the baby walking in front of us, which was disturbing in its own way. But ultimately, we realized he was inadvertently hitting on me. That in no way was reassuring; trust me. 


So if these are the reasons why Pat thinks I wouldn't be single in NYC, then I'm not really sure I want to not be single in NYC. Then again, recently, in a desperate (and drunken) moment, I exclaimed to my roommate that I would date "anyone, even a homeless person." So maybe I should reconsider New York?

Probably, because this also just happened:

So.