Miller Shyte

Let me just start out by saying that, as many of you know, my life-long dream is to be a housewife. I want my husband to make more money than me. I want him to be able to fix shit and carry things. I want to make sure dinner is on the table at 5 and impress people at cocktail parties. And most of all, I don't want to have a job.  That said, Miller Lite commercials are so fucking sexist I want to vomit all over my television every time I see one.

Their entire marketing campaign is based on the idea that Miller Lite is a "manly" beer.  Miller Lite? Really? I don't think so. In my opinion, no light beer is a manly beer. But more importantly, Miller Lite tastes like piss. PISS. If a guy ever buys me a Miller Lite, he can shit any possibility of going home with me right down the damn drain.


But why are you even listening to my opinion? I'm a female and therefore know nothing about beer.  And as Miller will tell you, I don't even care about taste!  In fact, I should really only be drinking this:

www.chickbeer.com

Because I gotta watch my figure, too. And the only way a girl can do that is by drinking absolute shit beer (at only 97 calories!) in a tacky bottle.  But, wait.  If that's the case, then shouldn't Miller Lite really be advertising to me?